About Dhyana Stanley
There was a time when I believed in peace but that was not the way I lived. I believed one thing yet lived another. I lived with stress, dissatisfaction, fear and an almost constant restlessness that something is wrong or missing. And this was my experience even during the years I spent in Mexico as a Christian missionary. |
But after I began to experience anxiety attacks and then went into a deep depression I began to look honestly at the discrepancy between my beliefs and my experience and gradually came to terms with the fact that my beliefs were not the truth and that I could no longer stay in the church.
When I left the church my search for peace and truth took some different turns. At times I tried to find it outside myself and at other times I tried to find it within by improving myself but none of it really worked. The feeling that something is wrong or missing continued to consume me.
And then after some intense suffering I went within exclusively and in a flash of recognition I realized that there is actually nothing at all missing. There is nothing wrong. Peace is here now. There was a profound knowing that I am whole already and do not need to be fixed, healed or transformed.
But although this direct knowing that I am whole was profound and there was a gradual increased sense of peace, there was still a lot of forgetfulness with unconscious, unloving reactions. And if this peace could only be sensed within and could not be expressed I knew it could not be the truth and I wanted nothing to do with it. So for a time I was testing this peace. Although at one level I knew it to be true, at another level I had to make sure it transferred into all areas of life before I would fully trust it – and thankfully Life honored my deepest intention for truth alone.
It turns out that the flash of recognition that I am whole already was only the very beginning of an amazing journey Home to what already is.
When I left the church my search for peace and truth took some different turns. At times I tried to find it outside myself and at other times I tried to find it within by improving myself but none of it really worked. The feeling that something is wrong or missing continued to consume me.
And then after some intense suffering I went within exclusively and in a flash of recognition I realized that there is actually nothing at all missing. There is nothing wrong. Peace is here now. There was a profound knowing that I am whole already and do not need to be fixed, healed or transformed.
But although this direct knowing that I am whole was profound and there was a gradual increased sense of peace, there was still a lot of forgetfulness with unconscious, unloving reactions. And if this peace could only be sensed within and could not be expressed I knew it could not be the truth and I wanted nothing to do with it. So for a time I was testing this peace. Although at one level I knew it to be true, at another level I had to make sure it transferred into all areas of life before I would fully trust it – and thankfully Life honored my deepest intention for truth alone.
It turns out that the flash of recognition that I am whole already was only the very beginning of an amazing journey Home to what already is.
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dhyanastanley@gmail.com
dhyanastanley@gmail.com